Can We Really Lean In?

I first heard about the book Lean In on a morning news show.  At that time the book had not even been released but had mega buzz.  The conversations on these shows sparked my interest.  There were tons of questions about what the author, Sheryl Sandberg, hoped to accomplish, why she didn't offer solutions, and even if it was purely an autobiography.

Well here's my take:

I actually enjoyed the book.  Sandberg is correct in that it isn't an autobiography, despite it reading like one.  While statistics are incorporated, the book shares the experiences of Sandberg in addition to other women.  I now understand why the discussions held prior to the books release were all over the place.  Simply put, it will mean different things to different people.  Life experiences will impact how you feel about this book and in some cases whether you will agree with Sandberg's perspective.   In my opinion, the book is not meant to solve all of the issues related to women in leadership (although she does offer some suggestions about improvements); instead, it pushes self-reflection on ways you can begin to "Lean In". 

For me, it brought out the biases I had about women leaders.  If you had of asked me my gender preference for a supervisor, hands down I would have said a man.  In my mind, I've had the worst women supervisors.  At least that's what I let myself believe.  When I actually took time out to write them out, only been 2 or 3 were span of Satan.  

After letting go of that, I began to feel empowered. There was this connection, a feeling that someone understood the challenges one faces being a women in corporate America.  And quite honestly, some of those challenges I never correlated to gender. 

I would be amiss to not acknowledge the things this book helped me learn about myself ; I now sit at the table!  But even if that had not occurred, I would applaud it if for nothing else than it has people talking.

“Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence.”

Perspective

It has been way too long since I've blogged and a friend so nicely reminded me. I was specifically asked to blog my thoughts about Tyler Perry's movie For Colored Girls. I must preface my thoughts however with the fact that I have never read the book nor have I seen the play. I think this is important to say because this movie based on, from what I understand, the play.

I think we all can agree that this movie touched all kinds of emotions, some of which I wasn't quite expecting, namely the male bashing part. I guess going to the movie knowing that it was about the pain of women and hearing an interview with Tyler stating that he had to add men to the script to make it a story, somewhat prepared me. Despite the criticism from many people (I even heard one young lady state that after seeing the movie she felt like she should go home and slit her wrist), I thought the movie was well put together and the acting was great (from the majority of the cast ESPECIALLY Kimberly Elise). Yes, I cried. But for me, I didn't go home sad, it was quite the opposite. I was strengthened and empowered. I saw how the strength of sisterhood holds us together. I witnessed how important it is for the generation ahead to reach back and grab us even when we fight against it. I saw the power of forgiveness. I was glad to say that in my life I've been surrounded by great women who could speak great things into my life. But most importantly, I was grateful; grateful that the challenges and trails that I have had did not overtake me. They haven't defined me. It reminded me of the poem by the great Dr. Maya Angelo...STILL I RISE.

"Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise."

Still I can see how others could have a different view. Some I believe are losing the fact that this movie is based upon a story that someone else wrote. Some are just tired of the negative view of black men or people. I get that. But for me it isn't what spoke the loudest. It wasn't MY truth. So this movie, as with anything else, brings out perspectives....what's yours?

It really is powerful!

This past weekend was Homecoming. The short version is that it was GREAT!! While the weekend was truly about seeing people you hadn't seen in a while it and of course partying, when I sit and reflect the power of relationship, love and upliftment comes to mind. Growing up I never had a group of female friends as it always lead to drama for one reason or another. But one thing that rings truth for me is that college life brought about the importance of true relationships...relationships that stood the test of times. And even though in my everyday life my core isn't around me that love, confidence, and "swag" is. Because of that I now have the honor of sharing that precious gift with others and it is a powerful thing. Why? Because it refutes everything that the world says it true: women, especially black women, can't get along; the crab mentality, the I mentality, etc. Now I'm not naive to believe that those things don't exist in America but it is wonderful to know that we as a people strive to squash them. It really is beautiful! Women uplifting one another, people meeting new people, people unconditionally showing love and concern for others...in the midst of everything that went on this is what touched me the most and what I will remember the most (of course the A-list dress I wore will rank up there too)!

I really hope that others saw and felt this and most importantly will choose to pass it on. Reach back and give it because it really is golden and I learned that everyone doesn't have it or know how to receive it.

Until next time people....GO GREEN!!!

And still I ask, have you shown love today?